HIV Status Talking

posted: 01/11/2010

Figures suggest that one in seven gay men on the scene in big cities has HIV, and that among men in their 30s and 40s, perhaps 1 in 3 men have HIV. Shocked? Many gay guys act like the risks aren't there and don’t seem worried. Almost half the gay men having casual sex never talk about HIV status with their partners.

Telling confidence 

Telling partners about having HIV is connected with how confident we feel. "It depends on how someone disclosing their status was taken in the past," Sona Barbosa of GMFA explains. "Some people have had really good feedback and they feel more confident saying, 'I'm HIV positive.' But those who've had negative feedback feel more reluctant to disclose."
 

Negative silence

HIV-negative men find talking about their own HIV status hard to talk about, as the men worry that being open about HIV will frighten off their shag. "People think, 'If I talk too much, I won't be accepted. If I broach the subject of being safe, I may lose the person: and so they find it's better not to talk, and not to risk losing the opportunity.'

But why take the risks (by not talking about your HIV status and not using condoms), putting your health on the line, and then face all the worries that follow taking those risks?
 

"This is such a cliché, but it's better to be safe than sorry;' says Peter Stevens, agony uncle for QX, the gay lifestyle magazine. "Lots of people are honest, but some guys lie about their status, and others might not even know they're HIV-positive.

So, if you can't be certain of someone's status, be aware of the ways the HIV virus can be transmitted, and make sure you're confident enough to ensure you both practise safer sex.”
 

The latest issue of FS for NW England for gay and bi men from gmfa includes articles on

• being more confident in talking about sex
• sex, drugs and smoking and breaking our bad habits now
• the 6 stupidest sex questions ever
• the FS problem page

Caring with Confidence

posted: 28/09/2009

If you are gay or are caring for someone who is gay, Caring with Confidence could help you and be for you.

Do you care?
Carers are often seen as those who have to give up their jobs to care for a relative or friend full time – doing everything from washing and dressing someone to making sure they take medication or can get out of the house. But there are lots of other ways we care for people.
 

Perhaps you go shopping for your neighbours once a week, or clean your Mum’s house? Perhaps you support your HIV positive partner – sorting out medication, or finding out the latest information? Perhaps you take your grandmother for a day out once a month? All these roles can define you as a carer. And that’s where Caring with Confidence, a free Department of Health backed knowledge and skills based learning experience for carers in England, comes in.
 

Research shows that carers within the LGBT community don't take up much support and encouragement for their caring roles.
People who are LGBT carers or carers of LGBT people are now offered the opportunity to make a positive difference to their life and that of the person they care for with the Caring with Confidence programme.
 

Caring with Confidence is aimed at improving support for carers aged over 18, and carers can develop their skills and knowledge by taking part in free local group sessions. In the north west, LGBT sessions are being provided by The Lesbian and Gay Foundation in Manchester, The Armistead Centre in Liverpool and SHIVER in Blackpool.
 

seven sessions menu

There are seven sessions to choose from, and to get started, carers can sign up to the first introductory session Finding Your Way, which is an opportunity to look at what matters to you and decide which other sessions you might want to do. You can then choose to do any or all of the following sessions:

• Caring and Coping,
• Caring and Me,
• Caring Day to Day,
• Caring and Resources,
• Caring and Life and
• Caring and Communicating.

Caring can sometimes be a lonely and isolating experience and the Caring with Confidence programme offers a fantastic opportunity to get support and share experience, meet new people who are in similar situations, learn new skills and best of all, it’s all free!
 

Money to pay for care while you attend

There is also finance available to provide alternative care if the person you care for needs help full time. The programme will offer support and help to carers, with particular emphasis on the millions of people who provide care on a daily basis but don’t know where to begin when it comes to accessing the services and benefits available to them, which can be particularly challenging for LGBT people.
Research also revealed that more than 60% of those people asked believed their caring role affected their health. As a result the need to support people looking after loved ones in a flexible manner has never been greater.

Free local sessions and distance learning options.
For more information or to book a session contact Annie Emery
annie@lgf.org.uk 0161 235 8024

The Lesbian & Gay Foundation
4th Floor Princess House
105-107 Princess St,
Manchester
M1 6DD
0161 235 8035