27 Years Living with HIV

posted: 08/03/2011

A Nottingham man diagnosed with HIV more than 25 years ago when he was 14, talks to his local paper about his life. He tells us about sex, relationships, and how talking openly about HIV with partners and others has helped change his life.

Matt Gregory is now a HIV health and treatment worker with Terrence Higgins Trust in Nottingham. He said: "To see the relief on someone's face when the HIV test comes back as negative is a great experience. If some people do test positive it's good they know as it gives them choices. I would rather know I am positive than be kept in the dark. I have choices about treatment, lifestyle and sexual partners."

Read and find inspiration in Matt's story of living with HIV.

Positive Speakers from George House Trust

HIV Status Talking

posted: 01/11/2010

Figures suggest that one in seven gay men on the scene in big cities has HIV, and that among men in their 30s and 40s, perhaps 1 in 3 men have HIV. Shocked? Many gay guys act like the risks aren't there and don’t seem worried. Almost half the gay men having casual sex never talk about HIV status with their partners.

Telling confidence 

Telling partners about having HIV is connected with how confident we feel. "It depends on how someone disclosing their status was taken in the past," Sona Barbosa of GMFA explains. "Some people have had really good feedback and they feel more confident saying, 'I'm HIV positive.' But those who've had negative feedback feel more reluctant to disclose."
 

Negative silence

HIV-negative men find talking about their own HIV status hard to talk about, as the men worry that being open about HIV will frighten off their shag. "People think, 'If I talk too much, I won't be accepted. If I broach the subject of being safe, I may lose the person: and so they find it's better not to talk, and not to risk losing the opportunity.'

But why take the risks (by not talking about your HIV status and not using condoms), putting your health on the line, and then face all the worries that follow taking those risks?
 

"This is such a cliché, but it's better to be safe than sorry;' says Peter Stevens, agony uncle for QX, the gay lifestyle magazine. "Lots of people are honest, but some guys lie about their status, and others might not even know they're HIV-positive.

So, if you can't be certain of someone's status, be aware of the ways the HIV virus can be transmitted, and make sure you're confident enough to ensure you both practise safer sex.”
 

The latest issue of FS for NW England for gay and bi men from gmfa includes articles on

• being more confident in talking about sex
• sex, drugs and smoking and breaking our bad habits now
• the 6 stupidest sex questions ever
• the FS problem page

Gay and Positive in 2010

posted: 07/01/2010

What’s it like to be a gay man with HIV in 2010? George (29), Leo (21), Tim (45), James (25), Jezz (37) and Ben (29) all talk about the ups and downs of being positive and gay in the latest issue of FS, gmfa’s magazine for NW England. Find out what they thought about HIV-positive guys before they were diagnosed, what it’s like being HIV-positive on the gay scene and their advice for HIV-negative guys.

And in the same issue 23 year old Adam talks about My Life – he’s positive too.
 

Problem Page - how to react when a positive guy tells you 

Sort It Out - the problem page – tackles how to react when a guy you’re about to shag with tells you he’s positive. Positive guys know from experience that half the time undiagnosed men make a mess of this – so here’s advice from readers and a counsellor on how not to embarrass the hell out of yourself with positive guys who trust you enough to tell you this.
 

Life Tips

There’s life tips in Change for Good – how to make those New Year resolutions stick and live the life you want.
 

Download the latest FS for NW England here and scroll down for back issues (and for other English regions) here - It's intended for adults - gay men.